This time of year...........

For the past few years I have gotten so very blue at the first hint of cooler weather. It would just all of a sudden hit me in the gut. Maybe when I was walking out of the office building at the end of the day, or maybe when I got to the apartment, walking for exercise, or maybe at Quietwater. The hit was never predictable. Finally I have figured it out. The cool weather is a precursor to the month of December. There are so many joyous things about this time of year that I concentrate on them really hard but the blues sneak in no matter.

Someone once told my oldest daughter that her daddy would not want her to be sad that he is no longer here with us. She responded by saying......he most certainly would want me to miss him. I feel the same way. It has been almost 12 years since Ed died in December 1997 and there are days when I ache from the hurt of missing him. I have to think the more a person touches your life the more you miss them when they are gone.

Here are some things I appreciated about Eddie:
1. He was a kind man. Especially a soft touch when it came to kids
2. He was an honest man
3. He made me laugh at his antics as much as he embarassed me at times
4. He made life fun and an adventure
5. He encouraged me to reach for my goals
6. He was a good daddy to our girls
7. He was passsionate about football which I have always enjoyed
8. He tolerated my love of cats
9. He just held my hand when sadness or frightening things came into my life
10. He kept me grounded (at least most of the time)
11. He learned to love my Alabama family as much as they loved him
12. He arranged private lessons for me to learn to scuba dive
13. He taught me about boats
14. He made it possible for us to travel and see so many places
15. He had the dream that became Quiet Water
16. He loved me

I hope with all my heart that he knew these things. I think he did. We always had a good laugh when we teased that we met and got married so young that it was a good thing we liked each other when we grew up.

My promise to his memory is that I will make sure all our grands will hear stories about him and see pictures so that they will have some idea what a good person he was. He would have loved all our grands and spoiled them rotten given half a chance. I just so wish he could have lived to see Ashley and Paige find the wonderful men in their lives. He would have loved Kevin & Phil and they would have enjoyed knowing him.

The holiday season is here again and it will be the 13th Christmas without Ed. That blows me away sometimes. At times it seems only yesterday I had to say goodbye. But I have said all that to say this: I know I am blessed. I count those blessings every day. With life comes happiness, sadness and all the emotions in between. That's what makes it life. If I had never loved then I would never have felt so sad to lose that love but then I would never have had the joy. So, even if the holidays are bittersweet it is still my favorite time of the year.

It's Been A While

It's been a very busy, hectic few months to say the least. I was traveling a lot until just before Carolena was born and have been trying to lend as much help to Ashley & Kevin as I can since August 19th when our little cutie pie made her debut. Amidst all the doings we celebrated two birthdays: Kyle and Paige are both Virgo babies. So far I think our family has managed to keep daily life as normal as possible all around. Paige, Phil and I are always sitting on ready when/if help is needed at the Long house. So far Carolena has been surprising "balanced" and was able to come home after only a week at ACH. I know Ashley and Kevin are under major stress and my heart hurts for them but when I look at that sweet baby girl I just melt. Counting blessings:
1. Carolena was born and didn't have to have immediate surgery
2. She came home after only 1 week in the hospital (no one expected it so soon...)
Aunt Paige shopped and stocked up the nursery for the homecomeing
Uncle PG came over and set up the co-sleeper so our little angel would have a
place to sleep
3. Ashley is doing well and healing (getting skinnier every day!)
4. Kyle & Todd just love their baby sister and I can already tell they are going to
be WAY over protective of her
5. Ashley got to be home for the boys' first day of their new school
6. Ashley got to be home for Kyle's birthday/ Paige's birthday
7. Neighbors and friends have been wonderful....sending over food so that no one
has to worry about preparing dinner
8. Carolena is doing the pooper thing so it looks like her intestinal problem is at
least stable. There will be surgery for that sooner than later :( But it's
necessary and she will be in good hands
9. Support and prayers from family/friends (and many others even though they don't
know us personally) has given us strength
10. Having God on our side to watch over my newest angel as well as her family. He
promised that he would not give us more than we can handle. He will be there
at our side always.

Note to my kids: I am so blessed to have each and every one of you in my life. It's the hard times that test us. With love and patience we will endure. I thank God every day for all of you.

Addendum to Fort D Trip

How in the world could I not include the final day of our visit? All the McCann kids were down at GGs until late afternoon when they left to go to swim practice and whatever else they had to do. Kyle loved hanging out with Micah and Aaron; Todd decided Gracie was his and Jasmine was icing on the cake and Zane just fell in love with Callie.

We all went out to Aunt Janet's/Uncle Steve's for a visit. The boys all love going out there where they can run around while we sit outside and watch them. Most of the puppies had to stay in the house while we were there....Todd is still really afraid of dogs and it is easier to separate them.

The boys ended up falling into (and then jumping into) the little kiddie pool that J keeps for the dogs to drink from. No swimsuits.........just shorts and T-shirts. The big boys had to travel back to Fort D naked with beach towels wrapped around them. Zane did not get as wet but was a dirty little kid nonetheless. Had to do some laundry when we got back to GG's house. Boys got a bath and stuff in the ears before they could eat dinner. They went to sleep almost before they got in bed.

I got stung by what we can only speculate was a hornet?? GG says that wasps don't leave stingers behind and Mr. Willie did find one in my face. So, I took benedryl and GG applied a soda paste to my face and I passed out on the couch....benedryl makes me really sleepy. I think the sting triggered an allergic reaction that caused me to have laryngitis BUT the face is OK....I just can't talk really well right now.

FUN WAS HAD BY ALL.............Uncle Steve you are a bad influence but they do all love you and of course they love the Kubota rides!!

Pappi and the Boyz

What a great trip to Alabama. My 3 traveling companions could not have been better travelers. Many people thought I was crazy to take a 5 year old, 4 year old and 19 month old on a long trip.....all at one time but hey, they just don't know what precious angels my boys can be.

We arrived late on Saturday and got a good night's sleep. Sunday it was church day and we got to see lots of friends and family and I got to show of my little guys. There were 3 trips to Montgomery while we were there: We visited Aunt Linda in the hospital before she was moved back to CH; visited Aunt Ellen/Uncle Tommy W....she made homemade strawberry ice cream...yummy..and Todd grazed his way through all the fruit in the refrigerator; then I took G'daddy back up for a doctor visit.

On the way back from seeing Aunt Ellen we stopped @ Publix to pick up some groceries so we were late, late getting back to Fort D. I didn't want to let them go to sleep so I was telling them about the time I lived in Montgomery, where I worked, where I went to school, the Air Force base, etc. During a little break in my tour guide program Kyle leans up and says "Pappi, are you talking to yourself???" After I stopped laughing I continued my tour guide speech. Further down the road Todd tells me his stomach is asking for junk food (apparently he was hungry). They crack me up!! We marked the heights of all the boys on THE DOOR and all of them have grown many inches since the last time they were measured. Not sure who is going to inherit that door but it will always be treasured.

Zane warmed up to GG by day two and let her rock him to sleep a couple of nights. He gave GG'daddy kisses good night and would tell him "nite nite". Everyone loved his antics and they found out what a sweet little boy he is. He had a couple of displays of temper but we all just laughed at him and he would end up laughing with us.

I really miss them tonight and find myself listening for them. I hope my big kids really do understand how much it means to me that I get to take their little ones on these trips. We have such a good time and I love the one on one time with them. Can't wait until the next trip!!

Is it really mid-June already??

The first six months of 2009 has just flown by. It has been crazy busy at work and I have been traveling a bit with trips to Fort Lauderdale, Chicago and Dallas to visit clients. Was able to work in one trip home to the Keys for 4 days which was just plain relaxing and I look forward to my next trip south. And lots of trips to Fort Myers to visit the kids.

Todd is now 4 years old and such a big boy with a new bike that he can ride with no training wheels! Kyle is out of school for the summer and is going to get to do some fun things but other days will be completely bored spending time with the parents at work. Zane is 18 months old and is saying so many words. He has also learned some sign language to help us understand what he is trying to convey. I am taking the 3 of them with me to Alabama in a week or so. We are going to visit the GGs for a few days. Thank you mamas and daddys for letting me have the kiddos for the trip. These trips are so special to me....and so much fun.

Bad storms have moved through the Bay area the last couple of days. Fortunately, we have not had the bad lightning or hail where I live but we could use some of the rain. It is so dry here and there is a big brushfire up north of us which has the air all smokey. Apparently it was caused by a lightning strike.

Tomorrow is going to be jeans day at work for me. I have had to wear business dress 3days this week for client meetings so I need to be comfortable tomorrow to get organized and get some of the backlog cleared out. Probably has to work Saturday as well to try to get everything done before my big trip.

Relaxed and Rested

There is nothing like a weekend @ QW to rejuvenate my spirits and to calm my soul. Boy did I need both of those things right now. It has been a wonderful stay and I hate to leave tomorrow but am already looking forward to the next time I can travel home. There will be visitors on a pretty steady basis starting in a couple of weeks so I wanted to make sure all is in order down here. The porch furniture needed some attention and the couch covers all got washed and repaired yesterday. Probably will have to recover the cushions before too long but will wait until after storm season passes. Sounds like there has been miserable weather up in Pinellas county this weekend so I am doubly glad to be on the island. Coco Plum has not been completely repaved after the sewers were put in so it is kinda bumpy coming down to Avenue K or L where the repaving has been done. The tide was way low yesterday when I walked on the beach and really high this morning.....but not in the yard thank goodness. Just the normal high tides. Water offshore yesterday, both the ocean and Florida Bay was smooth as glass so I wished that Sook had been running. Gotta get the little girl worked on so she can take us out to the reef and sandbar. Still beautiful weather down here, lots o fluffy clouds, but there were storms all around last night. The lightning was spectacular, and all the better, since it was a distance away. I love to watch it as long as it is not sitting right on top of where I am. By for now.

End of May

Can you believe it? We are only a few days from Hurricane season 2009. Where has the time gone in this year? It is true that time flies when you are having fun AND when you are just plain busy. Work is so busy this time of year and seems to get more so every year.

We are going to have another member in our family in a little over 2 months and we are excited but anxious because our little one has a very serious heart issue. Fortunately, because of tests done early on, my kids know (at least to the extent they can know) the challenges they are looking at with their baby daughter. As someone reminded me today, girls are strong, we endure much and we are fighters.

The cats that reside with me are now officially porch kitties. After the mess I came home to on Mother's Day I realized I have had enough. Nothing I do has done anything to make them stop using the carpet as their personal potty. It is soooooo nice to have a cleaner place when I come in from wherever........and I no longer have to cover the furniture to keep them from ruining it. No more closing doors to isolate cats to a certain room. I HAVE MY HOUSE BACK!!! and it feels so good. I think they are now content to be outside. Oreo fell off the porch once (I am on the 2nd story) so I put chicken wire across the rails to keep her from leaning too far over and falling off again. Shug has settled in OK.....Oreo howled in protest for a couple of days, well, maybe a week, but has stopped that now. They now have easy access to the lizards that frequent the porch and can look out at the squirrels and the dogs who walk in the wooded area behind the apartment building.

Looking forward to spending a few days @ Quietwater this weekend. Relaxation at it's finest.